Wednesday, May 14, 2008

I want that time back

As I'm preparing today's post I'm watching the season finale of my favorite guilty pleasure "America's Next Top Model". There were magic moments tonight, and it's share of putrid ones. A quick rundown:

  • getting to see once again 'how to smile with your eyes' as illustrated by Tyra
  • hearing Mr. Jay continually saying at the final runway show "you have got to stomp it to the death" - which may become my new motto
  • seeing hot boys in Versace briefs and eyeliner walking the runway in the runway show
  • Listening to Paulina Porizkova hate on the fatter model Whitney
  • Tyra's weave
  • the "on a very special episode of 'The Facts of Life'" type discussion at the very end about how Whitney can now have high self esteem as a chubby chick because she won AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm guessing that the editor was on crack because the show, which normally would be a 2 hour extravaganza, was cut down to a wee little hour presentation. There were no sensitive, reflective moments of the two finalists sitting on a monument or scenic overlook in a fabulous foreign city contemplating their futures of stomping down runways and concentrating on extending their neck in photos. There was no final review of all of the photos taken and analyzed down to the expression of every eyelash.

I feel robbed of the experience, because all 9 other finales delivered, where this one did not.

Dear Tyra Banks.
Please return that 55 minutes of my life that was wasted on your show's season finale. Feel free to return it in 5 minute increments or in a bulk sum. The choice is yours on how you give it back. Just know that you ain't getting anymore of my time on your sad-ass finales.

Thank you,

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